Not A Nice Girl – March Madness

While reading Donna Lambo-Weidner’s wonderful Hell Hath No Fury Like Miss Muffet Scorned I discovered this utterly hilarious prompt for alternative fairy tales and decided to add my own contribution to Susanna Leanard Hills March Madness 

goldilocksNot A Nice Girl

There once was a girl
Of nefarious intent
On breaking and entering
She was intent.

Through windows and door
Through keyholes and crack
She listened and poked
Looking for booty of which she was lack

Oh she was a terror
Bent on her schemes
Of capture and punishment
She NEVER dreamed

One day in the forest
She found and abode
What wonderful offerings
It was her mother load

Chairs of all sorts
And food all laid out
She’d sample it all
Of this she had no doubt

She went to the first
Finding it Cold
And too hot was the second
But the third – she was sold

She guzzled and gulped
This wonderful fare
Not dreaming at all
She was in the lair of a bear

The house was a trap
Set by the marshals of law
Ignorant of this
No idea what’s in store

The porridge was laced
With the help of a witch
Whose home she had burgled
That was the clinch

Needing a nap
After eating her fill
She tried to lie down
But the bed suited ill.

The next was no better
What’s this she did cry
But there on the third
She did finally lie

Out of the closet
Stepped the old father bear
Rubbing his hands
She’s caught in our snare

From that day to this
No sign has been seen
Of that nefarious girl
Not even a gleam

For you see
that while he was  law
Papa was still
A bear tooth and claw.




43 thoughts on “Not A Nice Girl – March Madness

  1. Nice to meet you via Susanna’s awesome contest! Fun entry…love all the naughty Goldilocks this year…well, I guess she was always naughty, but people never talked about it…now everything is fodder for the media.:) 🙂 🙂


    • Yes, personally I believe the original story was softened by her parents so people wouldn’t think they raised a bad girl. Quite the cover up. lol 😀


      • I love Susanna’s contests. I love writing and participating; but I love this evening while it rains, I can lay down and read the fun entries. Yours was very fun to read. Thanks for writing it. 😀


  2. What a great and hilarious perspective on turning the “victim” into the perpetrator. I love it! Now I’m curious what you can do with The Big Bad Wolf in the 3 Little Pigs – – I hear the poor guy had asthma and was entirely misunderstood!


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