I’ve given a great deal of thought lately on what it means to live a life that is worth living. For many years life to me meant making it through each day and not giving into depression or anxiety. Not allowing the fears and failures in my life take control.
For awhile that is enough and it was something I had to do as I beat back the demons of addiction and feelings of utter failure but I have slowly come to the understanding that it wasn’t really a life. It wasn’t enough to get over the past but in order to truly leave it behind I had to address those issues that had led me into the abyss and in a very real way still held me there. Treading water in the darkness no longer seemed to be worthwhile and I had to choose between letting go entirely or to start swimming toward the light.
A site called Spiritualer has recently come my way and the sayings and messages contained seemed to speak out as if they were talking to me directly. In particular is this quote which almost leapt off the page at me.
It made me realise that this is what I have been doing in a roundabout way with my blog. Sure there are some things that may appear to offer nothing more than a giggle but they are also about sharing my humour about different things with others.
My posts in regards to current events and the different issues that mean much to me are also a way of stepping out of the shadows and saying to the world that my opinions have worth. I no longer wish to hide behind a username and doing anonymous work for different groups that go out under their banners but not my name. Some of my pieces are quite personal, especially those dealing with issues from the past. It was quite nerve-wracking at the time to put these up for public comment but it was part of truly looking at who I was and who I wish to be.
So this is the life I’m building on this blog and in the ‘real’ world and I try very hard each and every night to remember: